As a keen kayaker the fact it is reported to have a great kayaking club is another bonus, a chance to get training for the big trip to the Pyrenees next year with the Procrastinate and Stuff the Consequences lads. So enough background, the decision was made. Now as many people may know, I have a 94 year old nan who is the nosiest woman I have ever met, who insisted that a visit must be made to Newcastle before moving, to check out the houses and Uni itself. Now she is not a women to cross, so this weekend just gone I packed up a few meagre belongings and put tyres to tarmac and drove in a Northwards directions. 6 hours later, numerous pee stops later and an accidental detour around Leeds I arrived in a pleasant mood to be greeted by sunshine and in plenty of time for my tour around the University facilities.
It was about then that I realised my tour was to take place amongst the potential Undergraduates. A bunch of young innocent girls of around 17 - 18 accompanied by Mummy and Daddy. Our tour leader, a nice enough chap took us around explaining the sites and facilities Newcastle had to offer. Within moments the learn ed fellow cottoned on that I didn't quite fit in with the group he was leading and was getting constantly distracted by them. It was sunny and I always say women look more attractive when it's sunny. Anyway, he then joined me in the general perusal of the group and the tour finished all too soon. The girls departed, the tour leader slunk off and I was left alone in the big city.
Time to see some houses. Now I had spent the last week busily planning and booking viewings and had over 14 houses to see over the two days I was there (Friday and Saturday). Let's just say this didn't go quite to plan, I hadn't factored in the general inability of an estate agent to stick to a schedule, or the inability of a Sat Nav to recognise that a toll road tunnel was not the way to what can only be described, in the nicest possible way, as the roughest looking pile of horse shit in the roughest looking area of the World I have ever been in. I went through the toll road three times before I took control over the automated journey and followed the signposts instead.
Viewings for the day were then over. Thoroughly depressed I journeyed to South Shields to my B+B that I had booked last minute at midnight the night before. Walking from my car in the general direction I thought it to be I was accosted by what I can only describe as teenage prostitutes. Ordinarily you would think this may excite me. It didn't. Not only could I not really understand the words that were a coming out of their mouth, their fake blonde hair and abnormally tanned and large boobs reminded me so much of a barbie and worsened my mood. Finally escaping the clutches of the whores I found the B+B. No one was there but there was a key hidden so I let myself in. Room was nice, if a little small and the toilet and shower was on the landing but all good. I decided to go for a walk and cheer myself up. Avoiding a bunch of drunk guys with identical shaved haircuts who seemed intent on engaging me in a game of fisty cuffs I found the coast and to be fair, pretty nice. My mood lifted a tad. Got back to the B+B without incident, stopping off at Morrisons for some raw ingredients for dinner, and met the middle aged B+B owner.
Now I don't know what it is about middle aged women, and I mean this with absolute humility, but they love me. A good flirt later I had a good idea of the good areas to look for housing in Newcastle (incidentally none of the places I had just been and very few of the places I had booked for the following day) and had had my breakfast package upgraded to include a full English breakfast. Winner.
Off up to my cubby hole in the attic to eat my feast and watch the Olympic ceremony. Not sure what happened but fell asleep before it started and woke up to Mr Bean shuffling around on the screen. Hoping that this wasn't the ceremony as that would be just shameful ( I since found out it was) and that the channel had changed itself I gave up on the real world and slipped off to my land of dreams where the teenage prostitutes were classy women in their 20's inviting me out for drinks.
I'm going to rush through the next day as I have blabbered for far too long. Fed well on numerous rashers of bacon, black coffee and toast I proceeded with my day. House after house, I found a few I liked but for different reasons these all fell through. One house stood out and I double checked the distance from uni to it and the cycle route I could take and all looked ok. I should point out at this point that I had decided to live by myself as I am an anti social bastard at times and like my own space. Also I'm nearly 25 and thought i had shared housing long enough. Time to head home to get some well earned sleep. The journey was quicker this time, just over 5 hours including the required pee and coffee stops. The little polo did me proud. A full tank got me 350 miles, not too bad all in all.
A little research before bed suddenly highlighted an important factor regarding the house I was ready to sign for on Monday...it was in one of the most deprived areas of Gateshead, Newcastle, crime was pretty high and the surrounding rows of houses were due to be demolished this year with residents protesting against forced evictions. Sounds like my dream home. So a few hours of hard thinking, a little searching and a complete change of plan. The North is scary. The people are scary. Friendly but Christ they are scary. I don't want to live by myself. I don't want to live away from other students. In fact I want to put myself in a cocoon with other students. So the big trip to find a house and check out the Uni turned into a big educational insight into Newcastle itself. Not what I was aiming for but useful none the less.
In other news I now know my exam dates for the summer, ill be finished by the 24th August so still time to find a house share with the least unlikeable students I can find. Move date up North is going to be around the 20th September. It's going to be bit of a culture shock, miles away from anyone I know, for nearly a year. I actually can't wait. Cardiff I'll be back, but the North is looking promising!
